The Last Glimpse

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It was a sunny Sunday morning when the news knocked on our door. The day when I was going to see my uncle for the last time. I could barely manage to confront the fact that it was my last glimpse of him. My grief did not allow me to react at that very moment, and I was numb, beyond words. It broke my heart into pieces to imagine a day without his love, as my uncle was a very special person.

I belong to a very reserved Brahmin family, where unfortunately performing rights and duties were considered superior to love and emotions. And to match the requirement, my uncle somehow strived to function better and be happier among the individuals of the family, though I could see the pain he had to go through in the family. I used to look at him always, and whenever I felt that he was low, I would take his hand in my hand and would ask, “Are you happy?” in sign language. He used to get tickled and would really laugh out, and in sign language, he would make me understand that he is really happy. We both used to laugh for several minutes, and the tensions would vanish away.

It was raining on that day, and all the members heaved a sigh of relief; they no more had to discuss and get worried about his future or the burden of who will take care of him. The funeral happened in our home compound, and I started witnessing the samskara ceremony. I could not see anyone breaking down. Grateful as such to the rains at least, everyone’s cheeks faked wet.


As they were about to begin the rites, one of my wise uncles stopped and asked, “Wait, how can you perform a Brahmin samskara for a person who has not fulfilled any Brahminical duties during his entire life, as per shastras?” and in front of the body, the discussion went on for 20-30 minutes.I walked away, left the house, and did not turn back to look at anyone.


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